By Daja, Contributing Writer
A Chance Encounter
There are many people who have inspired me as a parent over the years. There’s my Bradley instructor, my doula clients, my mother and grandmother, saints, and then there are chance encounters that surprised me, but stuck with me.
When I was a missionary in Mongolia and pregnant with our third child we lived in the capital city, Ulaanbaatar. I was teaching a childbirth class in the second largest city, Darhan. It was a four hour taxi drive. I went once a week for several months as I had several students there.
On one such journey I shared a taxi with an elderly missionary from India. This gentleman asked me about my baby–if we knew if we were having a boy or girl, if we had names picked out, etc. All the typical questions. Then he asked if I prayed for my baby.
Do you pray for his disposition? he asked.
How To Pray For My Preborn Baby
He continued to explain that when his wife was pregnant with their now grown children they prayed that their child would have a peaceful spirit. He said they prayed specifically that God would give their child a peaceful disposition. Not that the child wouldn’t be passionate or spirited or loud or whatever you think the opposite of peaceful is. But, they wanted, at the child’s core, to be a peace. Secure in themselves. Not fretful. Not anxious. Able to rest.
What a beautiful thought. I certainly hadn’t been praying that way. My prayers, up to that point, had been much more general. Prayers for a healthy baby, easy birth, you know, that kind of thing. Now I was thinking more specifically about this particular child and imaging his personality, his gifts, his disposition. And I started asking God, specifically, to help this child to feel security and peace. Shalom.
This elderly missionary went on to encourage me to read the Psalms out loud to my baby, inside the womb. Again, uh…what? I had not been doing that. Sure, my husband talked to the baby through the belly. But, we weren’t having story time with him and reading him Scriptures. This really made me think about what the baby could hear and how I could effect his disposition even in the womb.
I was pretty close to my due date, so there wasn’t a lot of time to implement these ideas. But, two years later I was again expecting a baby and I remember this wise old man’s words in that taxi cab in the Mongolian winter. I made sure I prayed for this child’s disposition. We made a CD of peaceful worship music during my 4th pregnancy. I listened to this same CD daily as I did my relaxation practice. It created a triggered response for relaxation. I’d hear those first notes of the first song and I could get in my happy place. While in labor I listened to the same CD, with my candles lit and sipping my tea. That labor was beautifully peaceful (and quick!), probably because I was so able to relax.
Then an interesting thing happened. About three weeks after birth we were having a rough night. Baby was super fussy. Nursing, rocking, swaddling, dancing around. Nothing was cutting it. In the quiet of the night I put on the relaxation CD. When the first few notes were heard the baby stopped screaming and listened. He quieted right down, breathed softly and went to sleep.
I was in awe.
This has worked ever since with all of my children and I have had five more since then. Each pregnancy music choices have been a bit different, depending on what I’m feeling at the time. But, I listen to the same thing throughout the whole pregnancy and labor, praying for my child. And they remember. After birth, they always remember. That music becomes a link for them to a peaceful place with mommy, regardless of how they feel outside the womb.
Here’s the takeaway:
- Pray for a peaceful disposition
- Read the Psalms and other peaceful and prayerful things to your child in the womb
- Use music to relax during pregnancy and watch the same music soothe your child after birth
For more inspiration in praying or your children, try this: Praying The Word For Our Children
Do You Pray for Your Preborn Baby? Do You Think it Made a Difference?
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